Wednesday, August 30, 2006

Quick Update

Feeling pretty good this week for no particular reason, thought I'd do a quick check-in with my blog.

  • School - Still procrastinating, have postponed my supervisor meeting till next week so I can give her more to slam. But feeling good about the little I have written. Gave a presentation in one of my classes this week that seemed to go down well.
  • Fancy dress party was ok. It was cold and outside so I stood by the fire. The old Eltham crowd and a few bogans. I ended up putting on my grandma's old velvet cape, some too-light foundation, very black eyeliner and dark red lippy and went as a goth. I thought I looked hot. Kinda Suicide Girls but without the airbrushing. I bought my friend a Toni Childs CD, as part of an ongoing joke CD gift tradition we've got (I bought it from the used CD stand at uni along with The Best of The Supremes and george's Polyserena; the former because I dig old Motown stuff, the latter because the person at the centre of my next dot point is involved with that album and I figured it would be a cool memento).
  • Received last Thursday night a (in my own words) "glorified booty call," which consisted of being invited to the Great Ocean Rd to "be free" with him. Apparently I need to lighten up because I work too hard, and a romantic weekend away with him is what I need. Yes, what a lovely thing to do IF I WAS STILL HIS GIRLFRIEND! Don't worry, he got yelled at big time on Friday...but we parted on good terms. Sneaky monkey.
  • The best news this week: walked into Esprit (shut up, I hate shopping and I don't have time to go anywhere cool) to buy some jeans...spotted a cute black skirt I had eyed months ago but they was too pricey. It was now half price and I fitted (comfortably) into a size...6!!!! Oh. My. God. I was excited when I went down to a 10 in jeans earlier this year. I don't feel like I've lost that much weight, but maybe sizes have gone crazy because the population is getting fatter. Who cares, the tag says 6. I bought a stripey light cotton knit as well.
  • I think David Tench is voiced by Tim Furguson. You know, the one from DAA who was actually kinda cool because he had a kind of Steve Martin thing going on and 1) Didn't EVER sing "Throw Your Arms Around Me" badly, or 2) Didn't play the guitar.
  • I love Chas from The Chaser so very very much. He's my second favorite after Chris.
  • Djoymi was my tutor two years ago. I love how the mainstream media think that us crazy media/film/cultural studies people are an oddity. We just write about contemporary texts, big deal.

Hope all you bloggers out there are kickin' it. See ya!

Friday, August 25, 2006

Snakes on a Plane - Review

Last night I went to see Snakes on a Plane (SoaP).

"Hello ladies..."

At the risk of sounding like Harry Knowles, I'm going to give a quick back story: I'm doing my thesis on the Internet phenomenon of SoaP and I've been waiting for it to come out forever. I was actually getting quite over the whole thing. What I think about the film doesn't actually matter, but its fun to write about. My brother, his gf and I went to dinner and then went to a 9.30pm session at Melbourne Central. Thankfully, we got good seats.

It was one of the best cinematic experiences of my life. The audience was rowdy and raucous and completely appreciative of the cheese they'd been given to eat. It was just so silly.

Yes, it was cheesy, B-turned-A movie that very nearly wreaked itself from too much hype...but it was a good cheesy B-turned-A movie. I had a blast.

First of all, it was scary. The first "Snake Attack" scene in the major cabin area was incredibly violent, graphic, claustrophobic and distressing. I was quite scared. THE SNAKES WERE CRAZY!

Second of all, the actors were all really, really good. Julianna Margulies, Bobby Cannavale, Todd Louiso, David Koechner, Rachel Blanchard - these are the best of the best B-but-should-be-A actors out there!!!! I mean, Todd Louiso and Bobby Cannavale doing the whole cop/expert thing - please, I would've seen it just for that scene!

Third of all, Samuel L. Jackson owns. His three best moments:
3) Picking up that yellow snake and just slapping it on the railing.
2) Taking the gun calmly off the crazy rapper. Very Jack Baur.
1) I'm not even going to say the all know it. It was awesome. The theatre erupted.

I'd like to praise the filmmakers for not letting the hype carry the film too much. Sure, it was still a B-level script, but it could've been a C-level script with the amount of hype. There were genuine moments of humour, suspense, action, and a few attempted moments of pathos that weren't too cringy. There were a few missed opportunities. I would've loved to see the kick boxer guy kick some snake ass. I thought the cinematography could've been a little better, but I was still in the space created.

It played very predictably, but since the surrounding kerfuffle of this movie has been anything but predictable because we've never seen anything like it, that's ok.

If you go in wanting a thrilling action horror - you will be adequately fulfilled.
If you go in wanting camp tongue-in-cheek - ditto.

Have fun with it, kids.

Sequel idea: Cheetah on a Bus. I wouldn't want to meet one.

Man, I really suck at writing reviews.

Thursday, August 24, 2006

Snakes on a Plane!!!!

I'll be seeing SoaP tonight with my brother and his lovely gf. I'll report on my thoughts on the film once I've seen it.

I'm actually writing my thesis on Internet Movie Fans, the websites they visit and the phenomenon of SoaP. This week I wrote to Henry Jenkins, the major theorist regarding convergence culture and consumer groups, about the film's response on the internet and he has quoted me on his blog:

Needless to say, I am quite chuffed! Check out Henry's blog, its really quite interesting for anyone interested in media studies.

Monday, August 21, 2006

Intimate Conversation...Ooh La La!

Oooh, I can't wait for the "intimate conversation" between Jessica and Karl...HAWT!

I bet it goes something like this:

J: You know Karl, IVF treatment was...*weep* hard.
K: I know Jess, I know...
J: As the woman, you feel so bad...."is there something wrong with me?" That's what you think.
K: No no Jess, there is nothing wrong with you....I bet it's your bastard husband Peter who's shooting blanks.
J: You think?
K: Yep. Absolutely! He's as barren as the Sahara! Look at you! Look at your feminine soft features, child-baring hips, and soothing cooing voice! I'm surprised you haven't already got up the duff from just using the toilet after him or something just as seemingly nonsexual.
J: Oh Karl! Peter an I are rarely...sexual.
K: WHAAAT!?!?!
J: He can't stand to touch me!
K: That bastard! What a fool! Why, even Eddie said he'd "bone" you. That's quite an endorsement!
J: Oh! I'm hideous! I'm a failure! Everyone hates me! Eddie wants to bone me, Ten want to sue me, everyone hates my laugh, I stuffed up that interview with the general, I fell down the stairs, my Mum has bipolar, I'm married to a nuff-nuff,...and now I can't get pregnant! Everyone hates me!
K: No!
J: Yes!
K: No!
J: Yes!
K: No!
J: Yes!
K: No!
J: Yes!
K: No!
J: Yes!
K: I'm telling you woman! I like you! Richard Wilkins thinks you're ok-ish. You're hot!
J: Oh Karl, this is quite...intimate.
K: Yes, it is quite...intimate.
*End of hour long interview*

Meanwhile, Meerkat Manor is starting on Ten this week. YES! Ten continues to be the only network with their priorities straight.

Its a great time to be alive, people. Great time.

Yes, I have gone quite insane. Its great!

Saturday, August 19, 2006

Emo angst time has begun...

"Hi. Where are you? Are you at home?"
"No, I'm at work."
"I thought you weren't speaking to me?"
"I...I think I'm having an anxiety attack."
"Yeah. Yeah...I think..."
"Where are you?"
"Umm...Brunswick St."
"How are you getting home? Are you driving?"
"Uhh, yeah. It doesn't matter..."
"Why don't you call your brother and get him to come get you?"
"No no no no....I'm alright. Don't worry about it, I'm sorry. I'm sorry to have rung you at work..."
"No don't go. What did you do today?"
"I was at Uni. I was at Uni all day. I was at Uni."
"Oh good. Did you get lots of work done?"
"....ahhh yeah. Look, it doesn't matter. Don't worry about it, don't worry about it...I'm sorry to ring you at work....Bye."

I feel I'm constantly resisting cliche, and constantly failing and then rearranging the situation so it all looks intentional.

Friday, August 18, 2006

Fancy Dress

One of my closest friends is having her 23rd next Saturday and is insisting on a fancy dress party. Not really like her, but whatever.

What should I go as? Do I take the easy route as hooker/slut/"promiscuous girl", which is a stable for most girls these days? Its an easy look for me too because I have kinda big kajungas.

But so many girls do that! Its boring! I want something original. But I don't want to actually put effort into it either.

Seeing how my blog is overrun with comments lately (!!) I thought people might have some ideas. My friends are not really "fancy dress" regulars and I'm a bit out of the loop.

Any suggestion is a good suggestion. Thanks!

Thursday, August 17, 2006

RIP Bruno Kirby

Familiar character actor Bruno Kirby died on Monday from leukemia.

Here's a link.

Its weird, these actors who we know from those pivotal character roles in films; I don't consciously remember them but when I know that their face will be gone forever, I get really sad. Kirby often played obnoxious, smarmy characters and I often didn't like him in films, but that's a sign of a good actor. And here's a sweet story from a talkbacker at AICN: So he was a good guy.

He was very funny too. He was great in This is Spinal Tap (one of my very favorite movies) especially the deleted scenes. And he has some of the best lines in City Slickers. Like when Billy Crystal is trying, very patiently and considerately, to explain how to work a VCR to Daniel Stern, and then Bruno interrupts with great intensity:

Kirby:"Shut up! Just shut up! He doesn't get it! He'll never get it! It's
been 4 hours! THE COWS CAN TAPE SOMETHING BY NOW! Forget about it please!"


Daniel Stern: How do you do the clock?

Kirby: You're dead. You are dead.

That brought on a lot of laughs to my early viewings. If you have any favorite stories to share, please do.

Monday, August 14, 2006


Nov 23 - Dec 22
Your big challenge now is to integrate your faith with reality and to do it in a pragmatic positive way. It is time for you to make the commitment to whatever education is necessary for your professional aspirations. Get clear about what you want from the privilege of this life. Get clear about the order of your priorities. Get away from people, places and things that aren't any good for you.
Yikes... I'll say.

Meanwhile I just watched Animal House for Cinema Studies and laughed WAY TOO MUCH at all the wrong places. Tom Hulce was such a cutie.

Saturday, August 12, 2006


On Thursday I made the spur of the moment decision (the only way to properly decide something) to accompany one of my dearest friends on the first leg of her Asia trek - 3 weeks on Koh Phangan!!!!!! That's a backpacker paradise island in Thailand!!!!! My friend and I are very excited, as we will be there for New Years and their famous Full Moon Party.

I can't remember the last time I had a proper holiday, and seeing how this year is turning out super stressful, I will really have a relaxing, fun time. Culture, parties, beach...Yay!

Nothing much else to report: thesis still crap. Went out for drinks with a friend I haven't seen for a while last night, and that was lovely. Then caught up with my ex, he wanted to see me, who is really stuffing me around. You don't want the story...yes you do! what else are blogs for??!! Shut up!
******You know, I posted it all, what happened and how I felt, and then felt instantly bad. So I deleated it. It wasn't that it was really defamatory or anything. Just...nah, it's not right to post. I never wanted this blog to be that. Sorry everyone. I must have some Libra in my charts or something. I change my mind a lot.*********

In movie news:

The much anticipated Halo movie being produced by the hobbit from Down Unda, Peter Jackson, has been given a director. He's untested, but the geeks are still excited.

An early (I don't think it's the first, but one of) test screening review of The Departed has been released. Its a remake of Infernal Affairs, directed by Scorsese and starring Leo and Matt. I'm really looking forward to it. Props also to Harry for the "foaming out the ass" comment. Nice. Pics.

Finally, this is kinda old (like from the comic con), but its fun. I'm linking to a Glorious Quicktime file because its better, but its also at YouTube if you want.
Do Snake on a Plane deserve to die? Anything Sam Jackson has ever said becomes a catch phrase. I love it. (The link wasn't working, so I linked to the JoBlo page, scroll to the bottom.)

Peace out bitches. Yay Thailand!!!!! New bikini!!!!

Wednesday, August 09, 2006


Makes. Me. Angry.

Note to Lindsay: Before Marilyn became a sex kitten pin-up (a wise career move that was purely her choice, of course, and didn't fuck her up at all either), she had a little thing called attractiveness. That doesn't include limp hair, squnity-eyes and malnourishment. She oozed sex appeal, not syphilis. Go snort some more coke. A lot in one sitting combined with alcohol, dehydration and, of course, some of your "asthma medicine" I hear gives you a real mellow high.

Lindsay's crew seem to think she's "talented" and will one day win an Oscar. The really sad thing is she probably will in 5 years for playing some junky hooker in her "brave" role.

Sunday, August 06, 2006

So much crap, so little time

So...yeah. What's been happening? I'll tell you...


- My bro's GF's 21st on Saturday was not too painful for my mother and I. She LOVED the gift we bought her (a faux fir pink stole - it even worked with her outfit and she wore it all night) and seemed to have a good time. There was free sparking red and food so all was good. Although being the accommodating chatty soul I am I got to talking with an older generation woman, the type who's always smiling and sunny to people. These oldies always seem to talk to me, and then I hear them behind my back saying things like "Isn't she gorgeous! What a delightful young woman!" (I shine when arse-kissing baby boomers). Anyway I get the obligatory "And do you have a boyfriend?" Sigh. I don't know what to say. Do I say through a tight grin "No, no, single as an albatross! Ha ha! Yes, too busy for boys," or "Actually I just broke up with someone I love WHO KEEPS PLAYING GAMES WITH MY HEART"??? *cue Backstreet Boys* To top it all off when asked "what do I do" I have to also give the thesis story to people who don't even know what the internet is, let alone new media, convergence studies and film review sites. GAH! Idiots!

- Speaking of my thesis, did I mention I'm more fucked than Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct? In case you didn't know, that's pretty fucked.

- And as if my life wasn't complicated enough, Australian Idol has started. Like all programs it jumped the shark, but I'll still watch. Why? Because like my Jewish sugar daddy from my old work said: we're all shmucks. And I love idol. I love James' bug eyes and Marcia's total irrelevancy. I love Kyle's ugliness and Mark's completely staged "wackiness." The only time I've ever voted in a reality T.V. show was just once, in the season 1 final, for this guy:

Why? I'll tell you why. Because that little Christian can fuckin' SING GODDAMNIT! And because even though he's got the biggest tool potential since Paul McDermott, this kid is IMPOSSIBLE to hate. Because he doesn't care. Guy doesn't give a shit what you or I or anyone thinks about him, his virginity or his hair. This kid is the shit. It was the best text message I've ever sent.

Bring on season 4! Maybe it will be good!!!

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

Gretel's Time to Shine...Literally!

Thoughts on Gretel's big night (Pictures are causing me troubles!!! I wanted pictures! Sorry!):

- There seemed to be an emphasis on the program's "social importance". The housemates (and the viewer) seemed to be reminded on more than one occasion that their bravery to appear on national television on a program that deliberately "confronts their fears and insecurities" and forces them to "reflect on themselves and their relationships with others" is highly commendable. This is because they, apparently, effectively act as a mirror for the wider society and so their confrontations and causes reflect our confrontations and causes. They were doing society a service. Big Brother showed clips of this occurring: Through David all gay citizens had their say on their right to have their relationships legally recognised by the state!!! Through Ash all...people with....lost to...say how sad they were....yeah! Though Camilla all highly opinionated semi-intelligent red heads got to be "happy with who they are!" Through Anna all moles got their "game on!!!" Through John and Ash and Camilla all consent-shady sexual encounters got their due representation!!!

What a wonderful year!!!! So much social consciousness these seemingly simple housmates had. And here I thought they were all dudes and moles...

- Gretel looked like a character from Doctor Who. An inter-galactic queen.

"We meet again Doctor..."

"Yes...yes we do...What have you been up to, evil Queen Malmorga? Release your prisoners, your concern is with me."

- Gretel also seemed to speak for every viewer who was not a 15 year old girl when she constantly and relentlessly praised Camilla for being a wonderful housemate. It is a source of predictable dismay for me when I think that the only non-bland male to win this show was a lovable idiot who everyone loved to laugh at.

- I can't wait for Jamie and Katie to really get married a-la Marty and Jess. One word people: class.

- There was a point where Jamie was watching himself back and said to Camilla: "Listen to me speak! I sound like an idiot!" I have to admit, he endeared himself to me then. He also seems able and willing to laugh at himself. The boy's alllllright.